Saturday, January 30, 2010
been looking at my hard-disk for enrolment stuff that was needed.
looking through photos that was under the folder 'darling'.
____________________
i know you love animals a lot.
i know you love the nature a lot.
i admit there are times when i really hope you don't need to go overseas and study. because i can't bear to let you go. but no matter how much i don't want you to go, i will still let you go because i will let you go.
staying in now compare to staying in last time is totally two different thing. because i have grown to love you more now then i used to last time. i have grown so used to seeing you everyday that i can't not see you for a day. it sound like i'm still a kid i know. but loving you can make me become a small little boy.
sound like i'm useless? maybe i am.
because i can't be your pillar of strength when you need one.
because i can't comfort you when i see you crying.
because i can't help you to solve any of the problem that you have.
most importantly, i'm the root of the cause most of the times.
but when i see you tired, and still have so many things to do, i heart shatter into pieces. how i wish you can just sleep at home everyday. at least you won't be tired. i'm sorry i didn't give the encouragement when you needed them most.
____________________
been coughing for 2 weeks and still going.
this cough is really irritating!
affect me is so many ways.
- can't sleep well at sleep.
- can't use my voice.
- can't talk softly (when cough when i do)
there are times when i cough till i want to vomit. =(
____________________
work being bad nowadays. and my ORD is coming soon. should be really happy when one is going to. but somehow i do not because i really don't know what to do after i ORD.
now just sit and just sit..
till then..
____________________
i miss you a lot.